No, this is NOT about how drunk I was last night (although TONIGHT might be a whole other story!!;)).. As has, unfortunately, become my nature as time passes me by, the topic is more an indication of the general tone of attitude. So just be warned...
I've been away for too long- so many times my desires to come here and jot down some of my numerous takes on various situations have been unfulfilled due to the general pace of life, and also technological difficulties (more like "difficulty", specifically the malfunction of the previous version of the editor in this site!), but mainly I guess its the anti-social sentiments which are creeping in on some unexplained level. Long story short, this post is way overdue (even though it won't really attempt to minimize the effects of the absence).
This is probably the paragraph where I whine about life in general, only..wait- I don't feel it anymore.. Quite honestly I'm moving towards not having the energy or the inclination to bother complaining anymore. The general sentiment is cold indifference, and a lack of energy or inclination to even care about THAT: the cold indifference. If not for one particular facet of my life (which I am unscrupulously under-emphasizing due to various reasons which, yet again, I do not wish to discuss- go figure!), I probably would be past feeling the need to blog, which actually would have been scary not so long ago; but not anymore.. What it means, even I'm not aware of.. Only time will tell I guess....
Life goes on.. I no longer look ahead, or behind.. Its supposed to be the most "healthy" thing to do/be/feel (delete as applicable), but its unnaturalness is leaving me feeling anything but. Now its more of a "take each day as it comes", with the inclusion of "and don't give a shit". So who am I to argue with the authorities on the subject, who insist that that is what one should do, right? Of course, I wouldn't mind a little smidgen of positivity that this mentality is supposed to be accompanied by, but hey- whats new?? Life has never been in a generous mood when it comes to giving me my due.. Or maybe I just have set my expectations too high? (which would be ironic, considering that I can't discern what my expectations ARE anymore, leave alone evaluate the feasibility of the same).
I'm waiting for the day when I can get back to a semblance of "normalcy" which I have a vague recollection of once able to hold on to. But my fingers aren't crossed. It may come, it may not; quite frankly, I couldn't care less. So we'll see how it goes.. Hopefully, I will be able to "pen" more "mundane" and "normal" posts in future. Till then, this will have to suffice..
